did tate mcrae like… do a murder
[in minecraft]
Ever since I heard Tate McCrae’s performance of “Sports Car” on SNL, I’ve had one question, which I will now share with you: what is this even supposed to be about.
I mean, it’s about sex, obviously. I’m not an idiot.1 But like. Really listen to this song. Look at the weird, horror-movie adjacent video. The chorus is just lines like I think you know what this is and we can uh-uh in it over and over. There is almost no detail beyond the knowledge that the subject of the song is single and in possession of a sports car, plus the repeated assurance that you know what “this” is. I have listened to this song so many times because I find it so baffling and creepy that I just can’t let it go. I think it was, no joke, my most listened-to song in April. Do you know how weird something has to be to beat Taylor for any “most listened-to” spot in any context?
So imagine you’re watching this video as one of a handful of artifacts of American culture that survived the societal collapse outlined in David Macaulay’s seminal text Motel of the Mysteries. Or maybe you’re a super intelligent rat.2 Put yourself in that headspace. What would you think this song is about? Would you wonder, as I do, whether or not Tate McRae bluffing you, like: yeah I think you know what this is. And I definitely know what this is. But like… you say it first. Just to prove you know what this is, a thing which I myself, as I’ve already said, know and don’t need to be told.
Because, okay, what it kind of sounds like, to me, is like Tate McRae is seeking a partner for cruising around for murder purposes. Like, she likes your sports car because you can “drive it real far,” so that the two of you can find people who are geographically distant from her for murder purposes. After abducting these people, you take them elsewhere to kidnap and torture in various locations:
In the alley, in the back
In the center of this room
With the windows rolled down
Not to mention:
On the corner of my bed
Oh, and maybe on the beach
You could do it on your own
While you're lookin' at me
You might be like “come on.” But… isn’t this what the song actually sounds like? Doesn’t it sound preposterously sinister for a sexy song?
Furthermore, think about it strategically. Tate McRae’s career has been defined by her inability to quite find her niche, because while she’s a great dancer, people do not listen to your dancing while they do the dishes. There are sexy pop stars, sad girl pop stars, crazy girl pop stars, and so on. Plausibly denial murder girl pop star is a pretty open lane. I don’t think anybody’s trying for it. As any devoted fan of Taylor Swift and Harry Styles can tell you, pop stars encoding messages about their past secret vehicle-related crimes is not new,3 but it’s been a while since somebody’s really said, you know what. I want to make that my thing.
Anyway Tate McRae if you see this I’m joking. I swear. I’m joking. Please don’t hit me with your car. I won’t blab. I mean I’m joking but even if I wasn’t. My lips are sealed.
Or at least, not all the time.
Reader
would win some kind of prize for guessing that all these rat jokes are all from reading this story if I’d thought of establishing a prize for this purpose.Not even slightly relevant but nevertheless:
I love this and want to suggest that “…Baby One More Time” is just as baffling and creepy as “Sports Car”—and that McRae’s track is intentionally echoing Britney. Both songs are elliptical, horny, and weirdly withholding. They don’t tell you what happened; they just drop you into a mood and assume you’re complicit.
Britney’s begging to be metaphorically hit again because her loneliness is killing her—cool, but what actually happened? Tate's doing the same thing: circling around the unspeakable, insisting “you know what this is.” It’s not narrative—it’s pop occultism: casting a spell that only works if no one names what’s really going on.
I fully support “plausible deniability murder girl pop” as a genre, though. Long overdue.
<3 David Macaulay’s seminal text Motel of the Mysteries <3
San-it-ized for your pro-tec-tion