this is very helpful! i find gift-giving and gift-giving both extremely anxiety-inducing and it's just not my love language - i am in most of my life a thoughtful, attentive, and caring person but i just never think to buy a thing for somebody else and rarely care much either way about things i get.
hahaha i'm sooooo bad at giving gifts that even reading this post stresses me out a little bit. if i really want to impress someone, i'll draw them a picture of their favorite cartoon character. beyond that, regardless of what the reaction is, i always *feel* like my attempts probably fell flat in some way about 85% of the time?? feeling ≠ reality, of course, and i'm never going to be upset *at the recipient* about it, that's twisted. but yeah youre def right that it's all about memory + specificity and i have the same thing happen when some asks me 'name your favorite movie' and my mind instantly purges all recollection of ever having seen a movie and i'm squinting into the darkness like 'i think i saw a movie.... sometime in 2003? 2004? at a friend's house, maybe? it was on dvd? i don't remember what happened in it. im getting a vague feeling of having enjoyed it'
this is very helpful! i find gift-giving and gift-giving both extremely anxiety-inducing and it's just not my love language - i am in most of my life a thoughtful, attentive, and caring person but i just never think to buy a thing for somebody else and rarely care much either way about things i get.
trying to find that quote about attention being a kind of love and google is only showing me self-help stuff and mood boards, alas
it's simone weil though i think she would probably frown on this gift guide lol
hahaha i'm sooooo bad at giving gifts that even reading this post stresses me out a little bit. if i really want to impress someone, i'll draw them a picture of their favorite cartoon character. beyond that, regardless of what the reaction is, i always *feel* like my attempts probably fell flat in some way about 85% of the time?? feeling ≠ reality, of course, and i'm never going to be upset *at the recipient* about it, that's twisted. but yeah youre def right that it's all about memory + specificity and i have the same thing happen when some asks me 'name your favorite movie' and my mind instantly purges all recollection of ever having seen a movie and i'm squinting into the darkness like 'i think i saw a movie.... sometime in 2003? 2004? at a friend's house, maybe? it was on dvd? i don't remember what happened in it. im getting a vague feeling of having enjoyed it'
haha I can never name favorites either. but I feel like a hand drawn gift like that is always special!